


Call you home.

by ambientbliss



Series: Gender differences. [2]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Always Female Stiles Stilinski, Broken Derek, Depression, Derek isn't dead, Drinking, F/M, Hallucinations, Hurt!Stiles, Kate is a bitch, Knotting, Mates, Mentions of Rape, Sexual Content, the sheriff's name is John
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-26
Updated: 2016-09-26
Packaged: 2018-08-17 12:05:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8143349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ambientbliss/pseuds/ambientbliss
Summary: ** Unbeta'd ** I don't own Teen Wolf.Everyone thinks he is dead, but he isn't and for once Derek is coming back to claim what is his. If she still wants him.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Tumblr for more fanfic's and other Teen Wolf Stuff!!!
> 
> halestil24.tumblr.com

Derek had come back to Beacon Hills because he had heard that someone killed Kate. Or re-killed her after she showed up as a werejaguar, and he really wanted to see Stiles. Derek was the king of lurking, so he did what he did best. Stood at the tree line during Lacrosse practice. The pack’s scent was everywhere, the wind blowing it to him. Scott, Kira, and Liam were on the field, Lydia was sitting on the bleachers. He didn’t need a sense of smell to know that, the redhead stood out like a sore thumb. But as Derek filtered through the scents, he couldn’t find Stiles,not even a faint linger of scent. There was no point in waiting here, if she wasn’t here. Instead of going to Lydia and asking, Derek headed straight for the Stilinski house. 

He had slipped into Stiles’s bedroom window with ease. The Jeep was outside, so she had to be here. The smell of lavender and mint was dull in the room, and Derek’s wolf all but ached to smell more of it. A visible layer of dust covered the desk, and the books. The bed was made perfectly, and everything was starting to give Derek a bad feeling. He needed answers, and he needed them now. 

When Derek knocked on the door it was Melissa who answered. Her eyes wide as she gasped. Derek had to remind himself that the pack thought he was dead. Nail in the coffin, blood spewing from his mouth, dead. “Melissa…” He felt his features soften with guilt. He was shocked when she embraced him, if she were a wolf she would have crushed some bones. “Derek Hale!” The tone was motherly, he missed that too. “I’m…” “Damn right you are! SCOTT! GET DOWN HERE NOW!” Melissa’s brows creased, it wasn’t disappointment, it was concern. After a quick glance, her lip quirked up. “It’s good to have you back honey.” Derek followed her into the living room, and watched as Scott all but tumbled down the stairs. “Mom what? Derek! WHAT THE HELL!” Derek just shoved his hands into his pockets. “We have a lot to talk about.” 

+++

Scott took everything really well, actually he wasn’t surprised but instead of blurting “Dude Stiles is going to kill you.” there was just silence. “Scott…” As if on cue the teen looked nervous. Scott knew the topic of Stiles would come up eventually. “Look Derek, a lot happened after Mexico. A lot has changed. Stiles… she…” “Scott… spit it out.” Derek’s eyes flashed red, it wasn’t in challenge, and Scott knew that. “She graduated early, she went to college. Derek she doesn’t live here anymore.” His heart dropped to his stomach. There was no way that his mate... that Stiles had left. “But the Jeep is still here?” His voice was a little broken. “Derek… Stiles is the one who killed Kate.” The older wolf’s head snapped up to look at the younger wolf. “There was a heavy bounty on her by Peter, who was happy to pay out. He practically paid for her school, and a new Jeep. The old one isn’t salvageable.” 

It made sense to Derek. If Peter put a bounty on Kate, and Stiles was the one to kill her he would do anything to repay her because she put herself in danger to do it, and Peter wouldn’t admit this to anyone but Derek… the older wolf was fond of Stiles. His wolf snapped at the idea of Stiles seeking out Kate and killing her. “Where did she go?” “Let’s go.” Scott got up from the couch. Intent on taking Derek to Stiles. Derek sat with Scott in an apartment across from Stiles’s actual apartment building. “Scott, why are we sitting in an empty apartment across the street?” Scott rubbed his hand through his hair. “Derek she is different. Very different. You need to see that before you barge in there. And Parrish and John went in on the apartment to check on her without her knowing it.”

Derek just nodded. Eventually he sent Scott home and he waited. Around 6pm a brand spanking new all black Jeep Renegade parked in front of the apartment building. When Stiles got out of the Jeep, Derek’s breath caught in his throat. Scott was right, Stiles was different. Gone was the short spunky pony tale, the plaid, superhero shirts, and really any color. Instead she wore tight dark jeans, combat boots, and a leather jacket with the hood pulled over her now long dark brown hair. The clothes fit her too well, Derek could feel his want for her stirring in his body. Stiles was now strikingly like Laura, not only making him restless, but his wolf as well.

He could never compare the two. Laura was his sister, but Stiles was no longer the tomboy he met in the woods. Stiles looked lethal, like a predator, and sexy as hell. Derek stifled a groan as he rubbed his hands over his face. “Stiles.” He jerked upright when he heard the second car door open. A man stepped out of the passenger side of the Jeep. Derek recognized the guy. It was Theo Raeken. Scott had mentioned him. For a moment, Derek panicked. Thinking Stiles may have found a boyfriend, she may have moved on as he knew she should have. But her body language said otherwise. Her hands shoved in her pockets, not holding his hand as he walked next to her, to close for Derek’s liking. When Stiles stopped to unlock the door Theo grinded himself against her, sending a snarl through Derek. Even though it looked all business, it still didn’t settle Derek.

As much as he wanted to rip the door off of the apartment and take what was his, he wouldn’t. Derek just sat there and waiting. Eventually, Theo left. His hair mussed up, and a slightly disappointed look on his face. Derek was forced to wonder how often that happened. He texted Scott, he was in for a long wait of watching Stiles. 

+++

Stiles didn’t feel good about it. She had never felt good about it. She was not a slut. She wasn’t. Nope. But Theo was there, and he was attractive enough. Theo would eventually develop feelings, if he hadn’t already. But Stiles, god she just wanted to feel something other than the relentless burning itch under her skin. Sometimes it wasn’t even worth it. Ever since Mexico she had a weird feeling, something just didn’t sit right. Stiles really tried to have closure, she really did. 

The new Jeep, the new clothes, the hair. Everything was different. Even getting out of Beacon Hills helped. The meds helped, but one depressed day, Stiles found herself getting a tattoo at a shop that Deaton had mentioned once before when they were working on the most recent big bad. Almost 2 hours later Stiles walked out with a new tattoo. She thought the burning under her skin would stop, the itch that ran through her veins. It did when Stiles was being thrown over the closest flat surface but only for a little while, less and less now. 

Something felt wrong, but then again everything felt wrong. Life without Derek was wrong, and that is when the medication was supposed to help. Stiles would be going back to Beacon Hills for Christmas break. She knew being back home would make things worse, but she couldn’t miss the traditional McCall Christmas festivities. Chills crept up Stiles’s spine as she walked out to her Jeep, her skin tingling with anticipation, and anxiety. She breathed out an irritated sigh when Theo strolled over to her Jeep. 

“What do you want Theo?” She continued to stuff her bag in the back seat. “I was wondering when you were leaving for home, but I see that question is answered for me.” His cocky attitude was rubbing Stiles the wrong way, it would make this easier. “This has to end Theo.” The boy reeled back. “What?” Stiles ran her hand through her hair. “I can’t do this anymore. It isn’t… I wasn’t in this for long term.” Theo just nodded. “I was wondering when this would happen. You are still hung up. I’ll be waiting when you are done wanting what you can’t have.” He turned and walked back to his truck. Stiles rolled her eyes and sent a text to her dad, telling him she was heading home.

+++

Derek watched Stiles’ interactions up until she headed back to Beacon Hills. He watched as Stiles went to and from what he could only assume were her finals. Occasionally Theo would come by, and Derek had to leave during those times. He couldn’t sit there and wait for him to come out, looking like he wanted to look after being with Stiles. His wolf kept chanting at him that his mate was laying with another and he had to remind himself that she thought he was dead.

He couldn’t deny that they had chemistry, and flirted ridiculously before Mexico. It really hit him after Kate turned him back into a 17 year old. Stiles had tried her best to take care of him, even though he was a stubborn jackass, and she smelled like home. It was a smell he never thought he would find, but here it was in a clumsy, smartass girl. And he loved her. Derek never acted on it, aside from the gazes, and brief touches. She was just too young, and she couldn’t do what Kate did to him to her. They had undeniably gotten closer. Then Kate happened again.

Now Derek sat outside of the Sheriff’s house, it was like he was flashing back to three years ago. His camaro parked around the block, where Stiles wouldn’t see it, and he was perched on the roof next to her window. He listened to the exchange between Stiles and the Sheriff. She seemed warmer, like herself but the words seemed forced. 

What Derek couldn’t see was the Sheriff motioning to Stiles to hand him her gun. Which she did with a sigh. It was John’s rule. No gun’s at the dinner table. He placed it in the safe waiting for when Stiles wished to retrieve it. Derek couldn’t see or hear the hug the Sheriff gave his daughter, and the shake in her hands as she gripped his shirt. 

It was dark by the time Stiles had made her way to her room with her bags. Derek watched as she put her bag down by the desk, and plopped on her bed curling in on herself. Derek wanted nothing more than to slink through the window and let Stiles know that he was alive. He couldn’t keep himself calm any longer. Derek jumped from the branch and headed back to the Camaro. He needed to see Peter, and get a few things in order.

+++

Being in Beacon Hills was hard. Really hard. Stiles fought with herself almost every hour not to go to the cemetery. She would have to eventually, but she was putting it off. When her father woke her up on Christmas morning with coffee she knew something was amiss. “What are you bribing me for?” Her voice still scratchy from sleep. “I have to run out for a bit. Parrish locked his keys in the damn station again.” It was a plausible, and it also gave her an out before having to go to the McCall’s. “Alright. Meet you at Momma McCall’s?” Stiles sipped at her coffee. The Sheriff kissed her forehead and nodded. 

Only after Stiles was sure her father was gone, she got up and started to get ready. The itch was back in full force, and once she was at least made up and hair done, Stiles grabbed her gun and got in the Jeep. She was quicker to her destination in the new Jeep. She wasn’t stalling or taking forever to start. 

The loft was quiet, and not as cold as she had expected. Peter must have kept the heat going to keep the pipes from freezing. Despite the time of day, it was dark in the loft. Stiles stood in front of the windows, trying to keep herself from breaking again. This was the first time she had been in the loft since she left. Since the funeral. 

Derek heard the heartbeat as it entered the loft. Assuming it was Peter, he rolled over. Then the scent hit him. Lavender and mint. Home. Quietly Derek walked down the stairs, finding Stiles standing in front of the windows. Her silhouette was dark. The tight dark jeans, the combat boots, the leather jacket. God he loved that leather jacket on her. 

He hadn’t even realized that he was still walking toward her until the floorboard creaked. In a swift and smooth movement Stiles and spun around, a gun drawn from somewhere he couldn’t pinpoint. The barrel pointing at his heart. Even he knew it was a money shot. “You… you are not real.” There was a shake in her voice, almost like she was unsure. “The meds were working damnit! YOU ARE NOT REAL!” Derek could feel the panic coming from Stiles. “Stiles… you have to breathe.” He put his hands up, his voice was calm. God he couldn’t stop looking at her. 

Her long dark hair in messy curls, falling just past her chest. Which dear god that v neck couldn’t possibly be any deeper. Holy hell Derek just can’t focus but he really should since there is a gun pointed at his chest. “You are dead. We buried you. Well not you, an empty casket but still. God, I can’t do the hallucinations again.” She was rambling, it comforted Derek to know that she still rambled, that part of her was the same. “You just told me to breathe? The hallucinations don’t talk.” 

Derek watched as Stiles’s hands started to tremble. In the time he has been watching her, had hadn’t seen her this shaken up. Without even thinking about how the movement might cause his imminent death, Derek reached out lowering the gun toward the floor. When Derek touched Stiles’s skin she jerked back but not for long. Her hand shot out grabbing at his arm feeling the solid body, the warm skin. Anytime she attempted to touch a hallucination, her hand went right through it. “Stiles?” 

Her doey brown eyes shot up, meeting Derek’s hazel ones. Derek didn’t realize he had taken the gun from Stiles until she launched herself into his arms and he felt the weight of it. Having Stiles pressed against him, he noticed many things. He felt whole, and she felt… perfect. Her body was small in his arms but very athletic and lean. With her nose burrowed in his neck, Derek took the chance to breathe in Stiles’s scent right from the source. He stiffened when he scented what was most likely Theo on her jacket. A sour orange smell. 

Stiles felt Derek stiffen and promptly removed herself from him, standing back a little. “Sorry.” In the moment of silence where Derek was warring with himself on what to actually say to her Stiles appeared to be shutting in on herself. He watched as she walked over to the couch and sat down. “We… we buried you. Well not you… we… you were dead.” She finally looked up at Derek. He expected hate and anger but instead she was on the brink of tears. In that moment Derek wondered how much his death had affected her. 

He took a seat on the couch as well, setting the gun on the table. Derek left some space between them, not wanting to push the boundaries. “I thought I was dying, apparently not. It’s part of the transformation to a full wolf.” “Why did you let us think you were dead?” There was no accusation in her voice, even though he knew he deserved it. “I wanted to protect you. Kate wanted to hurt me, and she would have come after you. She couldn’t have hurt me if I was dead.” Stiles fidgeted with the hem of her shirt, letting her old self break through the cracks of her walls she built. “Are you staying?” 

The question was loaded, and Derek knew it. “Yes.” Stiles just nodded. Her phone buzzed and she made to get up off of the couch. “Scott is having me and my dad over for dinner. You can.. You can join us if you want.” “I am going to see Peter. There are a few things that need to be taken care of.” Those were not the words he wanted to say, he wanted to jump at the idea of spending Christmas with Stiles and her family and he really didn’t want to spend his birthday with Peter, but it had to be done. Stiles brushed her fingers along Derek’s arm, leaving goosebumps in her wake then she left. It wasn’t until Derek couldn’t hear the Jeep anymore that he realized her gun was still on the table.

+++

Stiles’s hands shook a little as she drove over to the McCall house. It was a bitch to button up her plaid shirt. Having Derek back was like a shock to the system, she didn’t really know how to process it. She knew the grieving period was well over, but she would have never stopped grieving over Derek. But the touch of his hand made the itch go away, and the burning stop. Stiles kept waiting for it to come back but it didn’t. Something made her call Deaton while she drove. After explaining to him that she got the tattoo, and where she got it a lot of things were answered for her, but she still thought she might be insane. 

When she knocked on the door, and Scott opened it Stiles was quick to grab him by his collared shirt and drag him into the bathroom. Once the door was shut Stiles pulled herself to sit on the counter. “Scott what are you looking at me like that for?” The irritation mixed with panic in her voice was clear. “I just… you aren’t wearing dark clothes. A light plaid and white converse… It’s like you are you again.” He sounded almost ashamed to say it. 

“Scott… I saw him. I know I sound insane, but I saw him. Scott I saw Derek.” Stiles had expected Scott to look disappointed, instead he just had this knowing look. “You are not insane. He is very much alive, he came and talked to me a few days ago.” Stiles understood why Scott didn’t tell her. He didn’t want to see her broken again, she knew that. She hugged her best friend and left the bathroom just in time for the Sheriff to beckon them for dinner. Stiles laughed more than she remembers laughing in the last 6 months, but the way the Sheriff looked at her broke her heart. It was like the daughter he had taken from him reappeared. 

When they got home, and the Sheriff was sitting in his chair Stiles sat on the arm. “Hey Kiddo. Merry Christmas.” His eyes were heavy, and Stiles knew he was going to fall into his turkey coma any minute. “Dad… did you know Derek is alive?” John sucked in a deep breath, it was his tell. “Yeah kid. Only for a few weeks. Peter he kinda let the cat out of the bag so to speak. Stiles, I didn’t…” She cut him off. Patting his shoulder. “It’s okay. I know why you didn’t say anything.” John wrapped his daughter in a hug. “I love you kid.” “Love you dad. I’m going to go up. Don’t sleep down here!” Stiles gave her dad a knowing look and then headed up the stairs. 

As soon as she shut the door, Stiles knew she wasn’t alone and it didn’t bother her at all. Derek was standing by the window, with his hands shoved into his jean pockets. He looked nervous, and that didn’t really settle well with Stiles but she just walked to her old bed and sat down. “You forgot this at the loft.” Derek pointed to the gun on the desk. She nodded. Usually she felt naked without the gun but not now. “Thanks.” Her voice quiet, but she knew Derek would hear her. 

Stiles’s leg bounced on the floor, Derek couldn’t help but notice how nervous Stiles seemed in front of him. She never used to be that nervous. “Stiles…” Abruptly, Stiles stood pushing her fingers into her hair messing up the curls even more. Derek was a goner. Ever since he saw that leather jacket fitting her slight curves perfectly. Derek would have been gone on her even if she wasn’t his mate. “I killed her. You know that right?” There was an uncertainty in her voice, Stiles hated it and Derek was confused by it. “Scott told me, he didn’t give me any details but he said you killed her. I wanted to apologized, since… you know… I’m not dead.” Stiles stilled for a moment, then she laughed. “How did it happen?”

She gently rubbed her face. “I’ll recap the last what… almost 8 months for you.” Derek nodded. He wanted to know how they got to this moment, he made himself comfortable leaning against the edge of the desk. “When we got back from Mexico, Chris gave the humans of the pack guns with wolfsbane bullets. You know, that yellow shit, not the regular stuff. We were broken,” she laughed again, it was almost just breath, “I was a mess. Mentally I refused to believe you were dead and we needed closure. So, Lydia and my dad, they arranged a funeral with Peter.” Derek shifted a little on the desk. Stiles caught the movement but didn’t say anything about it. “After the funeral, it was nice by the way, we all headed in different directions. Scott with Kyra, Lydia with Parrish, Liam and Isaac, they left and Dad went to the station. So I was alone at home.”

Derek was extremely unsettled that everyone had left her alone, but he would deal with that later. “She was in the house. Kate never shifted but she wouldn’t shut up. Derek I… I didn’t kill her because she killed you. I didn’t even kill her because she was going to kill me. Honestly I would have let her.” Stiles stopped her pacing, standing right in front of Derek, his heart hammering and feeling sick at the thought of Stiles wanting to die. “She called me sweetie.” Derek shivered, but noticed the disgust in her voice. “I lost it. I unloaded the clip into her chest because of what she did to you. Not just killing your family, but for how she used you, what she did to you.” Derek never told anyone about the sexual abuse from Kate, but Stiles must have put together the missing pieces and figured it out. His mate was protecting him even when she thought he was dead.

Stiles continued before Derek could say anything. “After that… well… I broke. I thought the nogitsune broke me, no… your death broke me. I was hallucinating, you were always there. I was always crying… I pretty much pulled a Bella Swan after Edward left. Catatonic for a while, then the screaming and hallucinating. I’m on different meds, but I guess I can stop taking them. Then when I was more stable I graduated early, went to college, got an apartment, and now we are here.” Derek never broke eye contact, he needed to say something, he wanted to say something. His wolf was screaming at him to hugfixclaim! “You had a funeral for me?” Of course that is all that would come out.

A snort left Stiles. “Of course you would say that. Yeah we buried an empty coffin, put up a headstone that says Hale. No dates. I guess we can change it to Laura. It is in your family's plot area.” In that moment Derek couldn’t believe his Mate cared this much about him without even knowing she was his mate, or even accepting that she wanted to be his mate. As the brief silence grew, Derek could see Stiles drawing in on herself again. He let his hands gently grab her head, pulling her into him.

Their lips met and it was gentle at first, reassurance that he was in fact standing in front of her, breathing and living. Then it turned into something more. As Stiles gave Derek access to her mouth she moaned into him. Her hands trailed up to his neck and hair, while Derek’s hand found the base of her skull angling her to the perfect position. The kiss grew hungry, and desperate. Both of them filling the need to feel each other, an attempt to make up for the last 8 months.

Derek backed Stiles up until she dropped onto the bed, and he followed. Pressing his body into hers as she arched up off the bed at his touch. Without hesitation Stiles went for Derek’s jeans, he pressed his forehead to hers, breathing her in. “Stiles… I don’t have a condom.” His voice husky. “Fuck.” The word indicated that she didn’t keep any here either. “It’s okay, we can… it will be fine.” Derek pushed away from her a little, looking at her pleading eyes. “Stiles. I want this. It is like I need it to breathe, but I won’t ruin your life.” He watched the light dull in those honey brown eyes. “So me having your children would be life ruining?”

The smell of disappointment and sadness radiated off of her. The words having hit Derek in the stomach. “No. Fuck. That’s not what I meant.” He rolled off of her, pulling her into his side. “I won’t let a heat of the moment decision be the reason your dad wants to shoot me for not letting you finish college without a child.” The sour smell dissipated and Stiles nuzzled into Derek’s chest. “So, you’re not going anywhere?” “Nope. Staying right here.” There was silence, and Derek could hear her heart even out, and her breathing slow then a whisper “Happy birthday Der’k” before she fell asleep. He was perfectly content falling asleep right here with her.

++++

It had been a few days since Stiles had gotten back to her apartment. Derek stayed in Beacon Hills, she didn’t expect him to follow her. Along with Derek was her gun, she didn’t feel like she needed it anymore. A friend from one of her classes invited Stiles out to a pre-semester party at a frat house. Stiles figured why not, there was no need to hide in her apartment. Dressed in a black dress and wedges, Stiles headed out to the party.

The house was almost bursting at the seams when she got there, meeting her friend just before going inside. Stiles let loose for a while, dancing, and having a drink or two. Two turned into three and Stiles felt good, one more would make her buzzed but she liked to keep herself alert. From around the corner came Theo. Stalking toward her like she was his prey. That was his thing. “You look like you just came from a funeral.” Theo’s smile was almost sickening now. Stiles looked down at herself for a brief moment, realizing she wore the dress to Derek’s funeral. Suddenly she wanted to be with Derek and make better use of this dress. “I wore it to a funeral once.” Theo’s laugh made her sick. He started to dance with her, his hands on her hips pulling her in to whisper in her ear. “Want to get out of here? I know you have to be craving me as much as I am craving you.”

Stiles was craving alright, but she was craving Derek, she would always crave Derek. They hadn’t had physical contact since Christmas night in her old room. “I… Theo it’s over. I’m leaving.” Her voice had just enough venom in it to keep him from following her as she walked outside and jumped in the cab that had been sitting on the side of the house. “Beacon Hills please, Warehouse district.”

Ten minutes later Stiles stood outside of Derek’s loft knocking on the door. “Stiles?” Derek stood in his too tight jeans, and a t-shirt. When he took one look at Stiles he was hating his jeans and how tight they were. Stiles just walked passed him, stopping at the dining table by the windows. Derek shut the door and trailed after her, wondering what she was up to. When she felt him standing behind her, she turned around facing him but leaning against the table. “Derek, I need you. Make me feel something.” She was begging. “Stiles…” He wanted to, god he did. Not like this.

“Fuck me.” The words went straight to his dick, which he was having trouble controlling anyway with Stiles dressed like that. Her long legs disappearing under her dress. His wolf wasn’t helping, howling that she was giving him the green light to claim. Stiles reached for Derek, hooking her fingers into his waistband pulling him flush against her. His brain was still trying to process the best way to handle this when Stiles disappeared from his view. He looked down, she had dropped to her knees and already had him out of his jeans.

Without hesitation Stiles sucked Derek into her mouth. He was big, she wasn’t surprised by the fact, but she was surprised by how big he really was. “Shit.” Derek was breathing heavy as her tongue swirled around him. Stiles brought him to the brink of control then pulled away, standing in front of him. She captured his lips in hers and then pulled away. “I want you to fuck me over the table.” Stiles turned, leaning forward until the table bit into her hips.

Derek didn’t know when she lost her panties, but dear god he couldn’t control himself. Her scent was enticing, and the position she put herself in was driving his wolf insane. Stiles all but screamed as Derek buried himself deep inside her. When his legs were flush with hers, Stiles thought she could feel him in her throat. The slightest movement would pull her apart. Derek was so much bigger than Theo and it made her ache even more. She signaled Derek by pushed back a little and he started moving.

His hands had a bruising hold on her hips as he slammed her into the table. Derek could feel his body shaking, “Fuck, you’re so tight.” When he set a rhythm the haze of being inside his mate lifted, he was more aware of what was going on, and what wasn’t. Stiles wasn’t making any noises, nothing. He scented the air only to smell salt. Stiles was crying. “Stiles.” Derek stopped moving. “Fuck, did I hurt you?! Stiles look at me.” She turned her head and Derek saw the tears running down her face. As gently as he could, Derek pulled away slipping himself back into his pants ignoring Stiles begging him not to stop.

Derek could smell the sexual frustration rolling off of Stiles, and he hated it. But something was wrong and he was going to find out. Stiles seemed wobbly on her feet, he had seen her in heels before and he knew that wasn’t it. Then the alcohol smell hit him. “Have you been drinking?” Stiles sniffled. “I’m not drunk. I am very aware of my actions.” “You didn’t drive here did you?” Another sniffle. “No. I’m sorry… I’ll… I’ll go.” Stiles tried to walk past him, but Derek stopped her by placing his hand on her waist. When she didn’t try harder to leave, Derek wrapped his arms around her. “We need to talk about what just happened.” 

Stiles continued to sniffle, and wobble a little. Derek wasn’t going to have her break her ankles. He picked her up and carried her to his room. When they were in the bedroom, Derek set Stiles down on the bed, slipping off her heals. “What happened out there Stiles?” Derek sat next to Stiles who was not making eye contact with him. “You weren’t hurting me. Derek, when I thought you were dead, I felt dead inside. I wanted to feel something. The meds made it worse. Then I met Theo. I don’t have feelings for him Derek. I swear to god. If I would have known you weren’t dead…” Derek squeezed her hand. “We hooked up quite a few times. Any flat surface you know.” He did. He tried that method before.

She wiped her cheeks with her palm. “I broke it off, then I went to this party and he was there. He wanted to hook up again. I just… I couldn’t. I can’t.” Derek took that moment to look her in the eyes. “Is that why you came here dressed like that? God, you’re really trying to kill me.” Stiles snorted. It wasn’t often Derek made jokes, but when he did it was with her, it always had been. “This was the dress I wore to your funeral. I wanted to stop looking at it and thinking of your funeral.” “So you wanted me to fuck you in your funeral dress?” Derek could smell the wave of arousal rolling off of Stiles.

He wasn’t going to let this be how their first time was, but he was going to make this better. “I’m not going to fuck you, but I will give you something.” Derek leaned into Stiles, kissing her until she was laying on her back. His hand trailed up her thigh and under her dress until his fingers brushed her wet core. Stiles sucked in a shaky breath. Derek’s fingers explored her folds, until he slipped his middle and ring fingers into her. Stiles gasped, bucking her hips into his hand. His fingers were hitting her perfectly, and his lips were trailing across her neck. “Der…” Stiles started to moan but stopped herself. “Say it. You don’t have to be quiet.” Derek picked up the pace, curling his fingers perfectly. “Derek!” Stile tossed her head back, and moaned his name as her walls tightened around him.

When Stiles came down from her high Derek kissed her and curled into her. “What about you?” Stiles could still feel his erection. “Nope.” Stiles squirmed a little. “Oh god, I need to shower. I smell like a fucking frat party. It has to be killing you.” Derek didn’t really notice until she mentioned it. “I will take you home. Tomorrow we are going on a date.” Derek sat up and looked at Stiles. “You… you want to date me?” It was Derek’s turn to snort. “Isn’t it clear that I want more than to date you?” He leaned back and kissed her. Stiles smiled into the kiss and followed Derek out to his Camaro so he could drive her home.

The next day Derek picked Stiles up at her apartment, and took her on a date. Stiles had expected something secluded, but she was surprised when Derek took her to a nice restaurant where they sat by the window. He held her hand, and they played footsie under the table. After dinner they walked down main street, looking at all the shops and laughed at some of the people they saw. It was like they had been a regular couple, no supernatural crap jumping in. It was perfect.

Stiles had latched her lips on to Derek’s the moment they got through the loft door. Derek slammed the door shut and lifted Stiles up. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he took her to his room. The kiss was heated, both of them pouring every ounce of desire into it. As Derek’s hands slid under Stiles’s shirt she froze for a moment. She was going to have to tell him, he would find out soon enough. “Derek…” Her voice was just barely a breath. “Hmm.” He kept kissing her neck. “We need to talk about something.” He froze.

Derek hated it when people say things like we need to talk that means bad things. “It’s nothing bad, well I don’t think it’s bad.” Stiles spoke rapidly as if she read Derek’s mind. Derek stepped back from her for a moment. “Is this about yesterday?” Stiles nodded and started to lift the hem of her dress. “Wait. Stiles… you don’t have to be naked to tell me.” She laughed. “I want to show you.” She continued lifting the hem. “I started to feel like a bond was being connected between us, and it was a lot to take in. I know why, I knew before but it just confirmed it.”

He knew what bond she was talking about, but he felt it all the time. It was part of being an Alpha, and a werewolf. Humans shouldn’t feel the bond, not in the same way. “I didn’t tell you, that I got a tattoo.” Stiles finished pulled off her dress to reveal a fairly large black triskelion that had a shimmery watercolor background with the colors appearing to drip down her side to the end of her ribcage. “Tattoos don’t shimmer. I had gotten a name from Deaton, it is essentially an enchanted mark. I picked the triskele because of you. I was trying to find closure and I unknowingly created a mate mark.”

Derek couldn’t take his eyes off the mark. Stiles had marked herself. “Say something.” Her words broke his trance. Derek’s eyes locked with hers. “You want to be my mate?” There was more emotion in his voice than either of them expected. Stiles chewed on her bottom lip, it was a nervous habit she had that Derek found ridiculously adorable and he would deny it left and right to anyone but Stiles. Derek’s hands were on Stiles’s hips in an instant, his nose burrowing in her neck scenting her. The Lavender mint he loved so much. “I never said anything because I wanted to give you the choice.” His voice muffled by her skin. “You are my mate Stiles. I knew it since I was temporarily turned back into a 17 year old.”

Stiles relaxed in his grip. Pulling his face to hers. So much love and need was poured through their kiss. She tugged at Derek’s shirt. “Off.” He pulled it from his shoulders in a swift movement that Stiles would have to investigate later. While Derek pulled her bra from her body, Stiles worked his jeans open and slid them down his legs. The wolf was impatient, he freed them both from the remainder of their clothes and pulled them down onto the bed.

While Stiles enjoyed the activities they engaged in yesterday, she was ready. There was no waiting. Derek was on the same page as he pulled a condom from the bedside drawer and slipped it on. Stiles lay beneath him, bracing herself with her hands on his shoulders. Derek looked at her almost as if he was asking permission again. With her nod he was sliding into her effortlessly. The pressure was still a lot to take. When Derek was flush against her, Stiles clenched her eyes closed. Derek rubbed her side before lifting his hand to her cheek. “You okay?” there was strain in his voice. He was holding back.

“Yeah, you’re just… a lot bigger.” When she opened her eyes, Stiles found the wolf smirking. “If you don’t move soon I am going to combust, and take your ego with me.” Derek set a pace, slow and deep. Pulling moans from Stiles that she will deny until she is blue in the face. Derek left kisses all over her chest and neck before dropping his head to the crook of her neck. Stiles could feel the coil in her stomach tighten, her hands were shaking, she wasn’t going to be able to hold out much longer. “Fuck… Der…” His thrusts grew sloppy, as Stiles crumbled and clung to Derek as her orgasm took over her whole body. “Stiles…” Derek buried his face into her neck as he came.

They lay there a pile of sweat and heavy breathing. Derek rolled to his back, he had never felt this completely satisfied before. His body felt light, as if he were floating. For a moment he was worried that he would actually float away. Who knows, it could be a supernatural thing. You don’t know. But he was anchored. He turned to find Stiles’s hand in his. Her slender fingers wrapped around his sun tanned digits. “Do you want some water?” His voice was gravely, and if Stiles was standing she knew she would be face down on the floor. She nodded. Not trusting her voice.

Derek got up and disappeared from the room. Stiles climbed from the bed, testing her legs. Yup, jelly. Without much effort, she reached for Derek’s shirt and her panties. Stiles felt a little less vulnerable with something covering her, but inside she felt the bond swirling through her veins. When Derek reappeared he found Stiles wearing his shirt. His heart clenched, it was a sight he never wanted to stop seeing. He handed a bottle of water to Stiles and put on a fresh pair of briefs.

When he turned around Stiles was fidgeting with his shirt, and looking down into her lap. Derek’s brow furrowed, she was nervous again. “Stiles?” She looked up at the sound of his voice. “mhmm?” Derek sat down on the side of the bed he had previously occupied. “Everything okay?” Stiles started to chew on her lip. “I just… I realized that maybe you didn’t intend for me to stay and…” Derek stopped her, he couldn’t let her second guess this. Not ever.

“Stiles. Stop. You don’t have to go unless you want to?” He realized that maybe she did want to leave. “I… uh… I can take you home if you want.” It was Derek’s turn to look nervous, and he even sounded nervous. He didn’t like it. “No. I want to stay.” His shoulders relaxed and he pulled Stiles over to him, giving her a searing kiss. “I want you to stay too.”

++++

After their first date, Derek made it known to the pack that they were dating. Stiles didn’t want to drop “mates” yet just because Scott might lose it. He was still protective after Derek’s fake death, even though Derek made it abundantly clear he wasn’t going anywhere without Stiles. Stiles on the other hand worried about what her father would say. Surprisingly John was okay with it. He was just happy he got his little girl back.

Stiles had abandoned the psych meds, she didn’t need them anymore. She kept them just in case, but she stopped taking them after that night. Derek could smell the difference, he would never tell Stiles that, but the scent he loved so much no longer had a sour tinge to it. It was stronger and started to inhabit everything in his loft.

On New Year’s Eve Stiles came over to the loft. The pack wanted to have a party but Derek refused to give up his loft, so they opted for Lydia’s cabin. Stiles faked illness, and Derek stayed to take care of her. Secretly she wanted the time alone with Derek, away from supernatural ears and noses. School would start again and she didn’t know what that meant for their relationship so she was being greedy.

The two had abandoned the New Year’s special on T.V. in favor of some other activities. Currently Stiles was straddling Derek on his couch, naked. Derek’s shirt was somewhere on the floor, and his jeans and briefs around his ankles. Stiles had expertly slid the condom on, and was lowering herself onto him. Derek’s heart thundered in his chest. This wasn’t something he had even thought about. The possibility of Stiles doing things Kate did.

Stiles was so different, it wasn’t like a trigger, but it was similar. Kate always wanted to be in control, she was always on top. The difference between then and now was that while Stiles was essentially in control, Derek felt like he had control. The way Stiles places his hands on her hips urging him to guide her, the way she clung to him as if he was her lifeline.

When Stiles came she slumped against Derek’s chest while he continued to rock inside her. It was odd when Stiles started to feel anxiety in her hands, the cold tingle. The problem was it wasn’t coming from her. Stiles felt something off, and it was coming from Derek straight through their bond. Derek was fucking up into Stiles his head thrown back, when Stiles felt something larger at her entrance. A short burst of pain shot through her and then the realization of what was happening. “Der…” Stiles was gasping, and Derek was groaning. “Do… do you have a knot? Oh god.” Derek rocked up and hit her g-spot just right sending pleasure to her toes. “Derek! Is… are you knotting me?”

It seemed like her words shot straight to his ears. A whine left him and Stiles could feel anxiety and what she thought was embarrassment and shame in her stomach. It was all radiating from Derek. “Hey, hey look at me!” Derek looked at Stiles, his eyes pleading. His hips stopped moving. “Don’t… I’m sorry… Just… don’t…” He was begging, pleading with her. Derek’s hips jerked and Stiles moaned. God if Derek would just do that again. “You’re okay yeah?” Stiles’s eyes bore into Derek’s. She needed an answer. He nodded.

She experimentally rocked her hips forward, Derek’s head fell back a moan rumbling through his throat. Stiles kept moving, hitting just right every time. Until another orgasm hit her like a freight train. Her walls clenching around Derek’s knot tipped him over the edge. When Stiles came out of the haze of her orgasm Derek’s head was still dropped back, his hips stuttering involuntarily and he was still whining. Stiles’s walls clenched in an aftershock and Derek let out a pained noise. His knot ever present.

“Der, are… are you still coming?” His hands just held her, keeping her from moving. Stiles took that as a yes. She leaned forward trailing her nose up his neck, then kissing it. “It’s okay, god I love you.” Stiles nipped at his collarbone and Derek moaned. Stiles nuzzled her nose into the crook of his neck and rubbed her hands up and down his sides. Slowly the whining stopped, and even though Derek was still very large inside of her, his knot was going down.

When Stiles was able to pull herself from Derek, he needed to go clean up. So many thoughts were running through his mind. He didn’t tell Stiles he had a knot, he didn’t warn her. He was pretty sure she hated him, everything was ruined and it was because of him. Again. After cleaning up Derek put on a pair of sweatpants and sat down on the bed with his head in his hands. What he didn’t expect was Stiles to pull on his arm. She wore his shirt again, and she was looking at him like she was about to cry.

“I didn’t hurt you did I?” Derek’s voice sounded distant and utterly broken. “No. Derek you didn’t hurt me. Surprised me, worried me, and scared me a little. You still are actually.” Derek just nodded, he didn’t really know what to do with that information. “Has it happened before?” He took a deep breath. She was his mate, she should know. “Yeah, once.” Derek still wouldn’t make eye contact with Stiles. “With her. She uh… she laughed. I couldn’t control it then. It usually happens once around that age. Then only with your mate. She laughed and pretty much ridiculed me for it. More animal than man.”

Stiles pulled Derek’s chin up to force him to look at her. “We… she always was on top.” Stiles took Derek’s hand, squeezing it. “You were asking me not to laugh weren’t you?” He just nodded. “Derek Hale. I would never laugh at you, not like that. I’m sorry I sprung that on you, I’m perfectly fine not being on top, honestly I love you being in control of me.” Derek could hear the truth in her heart, and he could feel the concern flowing through their bond. “That wasn’t it… it was different with you. I liked it with you. I’m sorry, I should have told you. I will warn you next time so you can move.” Stiles scoffed.

“It was so freaking hot. God. It felt so good. I was just worried about you Der.” Derek pulled Stiles into his lap and laid down on the bed. “You made it easier.” Stiles looked up at him, her eyes asking him to keep talking. “I was panicking. I thought I ruined it. Us. But you said… did you mean it?” She twisted her leg with Derek’s. “Every word, big guy.” Her eyes trailed his body and noticed that her bite mark on his collarbone was still there. “Derek why aren’t you healing?” Derek looked down, and snorted a laugh. “It’s a mate mark. It takes longer, and I don’t want it to heal yet.”

Stiles laid there thinking about the information she just got, and processed all of it. But it still broke her heart hearing him whine like that. He was her strong Alpha, her Mate. He should never sound like that. “Please don’t make that noise again.” Her voice pleaded with him. “What noise?” Stiles hid her face in his chest. “That whining. It.. it hurt me to hear it, like I was hurting you.” “The only way you would have hurt me is by walking out the door afterwards. It’s kind of involuntary. It’s… it’s really intense, and sometimes you just can’t control it. Kissing me helped a lot. In fact, you kissing me all the time helps everything.”

A laugh broke through Stiles’s momentary silence. “I love you Sourwolf.” Derek kissed her head. “I love you too.” Stiles fell asleep in Derek’s arms again, mumbling something about this being the best New Year’s Eve ever. He wouldn’t deny that, and he sure as hell wouldn’t deny having her in his bed and arms every night.


End file.
